Posted in Reviews

Twilight: The final verdict

Twilight has some glaring problems, even from the start. Its characters are weak, the romance is flat and unrealistic, and the stakes are incredibly low. The conflict isn’t even brought in until seven or eight chapters from the end.

It doesn’t even lay the foundation well for the Volturi, who are supposed to be the series big bad. That wouldn’t have been as big a problem if there had been six or seven books in the series. But since New Moon is the halfway point it really contributes to the half-baked sensation I always get about the Volturi threat.

Judging Twilight by itself it’s….meh. The romance is forced and very G rated. The vampire threat is really downplayed, so our one-off villain doesn’t really strike terror into our hearts. She ruined our big reveal of Edward’s true nature because it’s on the back cover. We know what’s going on from the moment we meet the character. It’s a long period of Bella being insufferably obtuse.

Its problems only become more glaring within the context of the series as a whole. Twilight could have been really awesome with some minor plot or character tweaks. So I give it the stamp of Needs Improvement.

I know this book is a lot of people’s guilty pleasure book, but I can’t in good conscience say that I’d recommend a person go out and buy it full price. If you can find this at a thrift store, garage sale, or borrow it from a friend, it’s worth a read, if only the bile fascination.

Arbitrary purple prose rating: Violet. It’s not the worst example of purple prose I have ever had the displeasure of reading. Occasionally Meyer gives us a very pretty line or quote, which I am grateful for when I’m wading through the quagmire.

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